Bronson

Charles Salvador AKA Charles Bronson AKA Charles Ali Ahmed AKA Michael Gordon Peterson

• After getting involved in petty crime, he got into serious trouble for the first time after crashing a stolen lorry into a car. He ran 90 miles (140 km) away from the scene to his parents' home, where he was apprehended.

• At Broadmoor, Bronson attempted to strangle Gordon Robinson to death but was prevented from doing so when the silk tie he was using to garotte him snapped. Following this failure Bronson again became depressed, but found his spirits lifted when Ronnie Kray arranged a visit from boxer Terry Downes.

• He also spent a month at Durham, where he bonded with a family of rodents that crept into his cage.

• In 1989 he was moved to Long Lartin, and settled in well at the prison until he "went over the edge" and ran riot in the nude, clutching onto a spear he fashioned out of a broken bottle and a broom handle.

• On remand in Woodhill he took a civilian librarian hostage, and demanded an inflatable doll, a helicopter and a cup of tea from police negotiators. He released the hostage after being disgusted when he broke wind in front of him.

• He sang and laughed and forced the Iraqis to tickle his feet and call him 'General'. He demanded a plane to take him to Libya, two Uzi sub-machine guns, 5,000 rounds of ammunition, and an axe. He released Greasley, but began chanting "I want ice cream". He felt guilty after hitting one of the hostages with a metal tray and therefore insisted the same hostage hit him over the head four times so as to call it 'quits'.

De flesch

A children's picture book from the Memory of the Netherlands: A respectable family man, who after winning the lottery blows it all on drink. It's got it all – poverty, domestic violence and finally insanity. 'A rollicking bedtime read for the kids.'

Diaries of a Nobody

Derek: [1] [2] [3].

The day is cold and gloomy, though dry. I spent the morning repairing one of my temple garments; I also hit the street to renew a book at the library and also buy some oats and peas for the rabbits. While I was in the shop, a man in motor cycle gear asked me if the oats were for rabbits. He spoke curiously. Anyway, he then ordered two pounds of mixed molasses. I asked him if they were for a lion. The girl serving us broke into laughter; he did not.

[Elucidation] Most endearing.

Dour English

The gloomy world of spoken English (hover over the pink phrases to hear them): e.g. Past tense:

My friend had left me and I was unhappy…

I weighed 99 kilos.
Did your girl-friend say you were fat?
No, she didn't say that....

…because she'd already left me!
But had she really liked you?
No, she hadn't ever really been serious about me…

I'd been eating from the fridge at night.
Had nobody been checking the fridge?
No, my mother hadn't been checking.
I was eating 6 Big Macs a day!
Why were you eating so much?
I wasn't eating because I was hungry…

Then I met someone new and everything changed…